Review: Backlash: Oblivion 2 (1996)

4 out of 5 full moons

Oblivion and Oblivion 2 are easily the best non-R-rated Full Moon flicks I've seen.

Backlash picks up where the first ended: Zach is the new sheriff, his friends Stella (Meg Foster) and Buteo (Jimmie F. Skaggs) are his deputies, Lash is still teamed up with dumb-but-strong Irwin Keyes (yes, Jaws from James Bond), and so on, and so on.

It's a scifi western, love triangle, mystery thriller all rolled into one. Sweeney, the galaxy's most feared bounty hunter, rolls into Oblivion looking for an arch-criminal in disguise. Zach immediately offers up Lash as the bad mama, but soon realized she's not the one. Stuff happens for an hour and we end up with another giant scorpion finale.

Maybe the best role in the whole thing goes to George Takei's bumbling doctor/mad scientist, Doc Valentine whose penchant for drunken rambling turns out quite funny.

Review: The Dead Hate the Living (2000)

4 out of 5 full moons

Just what I like to see in a post-90's Full Moon release: they really tried! The script is up to snuff - getting the film moving with a bang before we drop into character intros. The acting is enough to carry it along, and the sets and effects are great. Especially the effects!

What we get with The Dead Hate the Living that you won't find on most post-Paramount Full Moon flicks is gore! Certifiable gore! As for plot....sure, it's dumb, even trite, and most definitely unoriginal, but its also funny, quick, and bends over for gore.

Basically, we've got a small indie film crew with one camera shooting a zombie movie in some abandoned laboratory. There's some "in-jokes" about Romero and Savini and Campbell and Karloff and one of the crew members has a FULCI LIVES bumper sticker. Unfortunately for the crew, there's some real zombies and a mad scientist who brought them back to life in the lab as well. Yeah, you read that right: zombies and mad scientists!! Mayhem ensues. And the film hangs tight, but the ending....the ending is fantastic! No spoilers here.

More than a "rentable" little movie, I think, if you're a Full Moon fan you'll really fall a bit for this one.

Other Reviews: Cold Fusion, Bad Movie Report, 1000 Misspent Hours.

Review: Bloodlust: Subspecies 3 (1994)

4 out of 5 full moons

Ok, so picking up right where we left off with Bloodstone, Bloodlust continues the story of blood-drooler Radu, lovely and newly-vampired Michelle, and Michelle's sister Rebecca. Also vampired up now is Liuetenant Marin.

Radu continues to be the star of the series, but Michelle gains serious momentum in this film. She portrays a new vampire with an anxiety that seems realistic for such an outlandish bunch of plots. The other actors round out a solid cast, but, of course, Anders Hove's Radu is the terribly engaging monstrosity that you can't get enough of.

Best Quote: Radu: "There is no love between the living and the dead. What you feel is hunger."

Amen, brother. These and some other cool-ass vampire lines are delivered with an almost Godfather-Brando quality of voice. Just for giggles, try them yourself, in your best Brando voice:

"See the fear pulsing in his veins. Drink. Savor his agony."

or,

"I have killed my father...my brother and my mother. I have wiped out my

entire bloodline for you. And what do you offer me in return?"

Anyhow, I gave it a four only because of the 10 minutes of unwelcome intrusion by Bob, the CIA guy. An armed siege againt a vampire's castle is kind of cool, but Bob has dead extra writte all over him.

Tips for the newly vampired:

1. Make sure when night falls, you wake up from your coffin first.

2. Don't drool out half the blood you suck.

3. Have someone guard you during the day.

4. Don't chain your enemies to walls with old, flimsy iron and then go to sleep.

Review: Bloodstone: Subspecies 2 (1993)

4 out of 5 stars

So, with a minor hit on his hands, Band sends Ted Nicolaou back to Romania to film two more Subspecies flicks to complete a trilogy. Most of the first cast is unavailable, the notable exception being our boogieman Anders Hove (Radu). Presto!, and we get Bloodstone.

The film picks up right where the first ends, and we get our first taste of Radu getting put back together (remember, there are two more sequels after this). The plot centers around Radu and his mom, the mummified sorcerer alluded to in the original whom he calls "mummy", and Michelle, the newly minted vampire hottie whom Radu so desires.

Michelle is played by Full Moon regular Denice Duff this time around, and she does a really fantastic job going through the wants, needs, and pains associated with being a new vampire. Of course, Anders Hove is the center of the Subspecies universe and he turns in another spectacularly manic performance.

Best quote: Radu: "I bring you a sacred gift...the blood of my father. The king is...but a memory."

So, the travails of the newly vampired: Michelle gets found "dead" in the bathtub of her hotel room during the day, and quickly escapes her body bag when night falls. We then are introduced to a police character: Lieutenant Marin, a bumbling sandwich-eating amalgamation of every 60's TV private eye you've seen.

Her sister arrives from the states and forms a bond with the US embassy man as they try to find Michelle, and all sorts of running around Bucharest and the Vladislava castle ensue. The plot is just good enough to provide filler between scenes as we wait for more Radu and his mom.

Tips for Vampire Hunters:

1. No sleeping in on the day of the hunt. If you wait until late afternoon to go after a vampire, chances are your prey will awaken right as you are about to drive that stake through his heart.

2. No metal! Use wood, dummy!

3. No walking backwards in dark, creepy vampire-infested places. Duh.

Other reviews: Darkness Embraced, eSplatter, Subspecies Fan Page.

Review: The Gingerdead Man (2005)

4 out of 5 stars

I rented The Gingerdead Man last night. I think the Hollywood Video clerk smirked when I put my head down to find my membership card in my wallet, but I can't be sure.

I was actually a bit excited about the movie. It's been a long time since I've seen new Full Moon blood. So, first out of the gate is a serial killin' cookie played by the drunk and scaryfunny Gary Busey. Obviously, it's campy, and a little bit fun, and a little bit gory.

But, I'm a bit pissed that Band and co. would charge $19.99 for a 60-minute movie. Even the rental fee (it's considered a "new release") seemed a bit much. Maybe a dollar to rent and five to buy would be fair.

Best Quote: Amos: "Let's get the lights on. I wanna see this fucker when I blast him to crumbs."

Best Quote 2: Brick: "A mosh pit of tag-team damage and body slammage. And, in this corner: the Butcher Baker!"

The plot is no more convoluted than any other "serial-killer-comes-back-to-life-as-a-blank" flick. And there isn't much wasted momentum which is key to a flick like this, and obviously the result of Charles Band's ever efficient direction.

Gary Busey is paydirt! Hopefully, Gingerdead will be the beginning of a Full Moon renaissance for Mr. Crazy. One can only dream. His voice as the cookie, spewing out "Take that punk BITCH!!" invective is highlight-reel material. As is his opening scene, in full crazyBusey serial killin' glory.

The supporting cast is as good as needs be and a bit better. They seem to have a good old Texas Dazed and Confused sensibility. Especially noteworthy is "Amos", the funny, pure-hearted town delinquent who wears a "Pull My Finger" t-shirt.

I have only two problems (a bit nitpicky, I know):

1. the oven-baked mom didn't look all that oven-baked. Where's the gore?

2. The 30 or so shots that the cookie gets off with a six-shooter is kinda ridiculous.

Anyhow, overall a happy, if brief, return to the director's chair for Mr. Band has produced this bizarre little piece of film magic. I heartily endorse, and screw that sniveling gimp at Hollywood Video.

(found a good interview with Charles Band, which mentions all of his new projects and some back story on his career and the Full Moon label)

Other reviews: Draven99, Coldfusion Video Reviews, B-Ware the Blog, Dr. Gore, Horror's Not Dead